You are right that Halloween appears to be the last remaining neighbourhood tradition, where we knock on each other's doors, actually get to interact with each other, and show goodwill especially towards young children. Although I am not a fan of the displayed gore and death, I appreciate the opportunity to meet many new faces, an opening to connections that carries over into the rest of the year. Fortunately our neighbourhood is very safe, and everyone is out on foot (no crazy drivers). The year of the pandemic, many older people made a particular effort to offer children joy, and had prepared outdoor tables heaped with candy bags, and even a candy shoot that could be operated from inside the house, working around some of the restrictions at that time. I had not grown up with this tradition in Switzerland, but appreciate the neighbourhood ties that it helps to form each year :)
I don't like the gore, either -- or many of the other things that Halloween now represents. Many adults these days seem to use it as an excuse to celebrate evil. The trick-or-treating part is something I hope we can hold onto, though, for the reasons you and I both appreciate! I'm so glad your neighborhood doesn't have crazy drivers, and does have a generous community spirit! That's as it should be.
I remember the candy chutes during the pandemic, too! So playful! My kids still talk about one particular house's epic chute.
I LOVE this - my husband & I were just talking about this very same thing...that Halloween is one of the last shared holidays everyone does together in our country. It's unspoken knowledge that a house with lights on will get door-knocked on Halloween. I love the bit of hospitality it invokes as we actually go door to door and greet neighbors who we may otherwise not know!
It's a special feeling, the neighborliness on that night, isn't it? And it only happens because we have this custom. Otherwise we'd be just as private and timid and wary as usual. We lost a lot when we lost so many of our communal customs...or just replaced them with ones geared towards disrespect and atomization.
I'm so glad you brought my awareness to this, I hadn't even thought about it! I have seen cars trailing their kiddos, and I agree that it is dangerous and ruins the whole "neighborhood" effect. We usually do a very short walking lap around the neighborhood, early in the evening, since everyone around here is so little. I have seen the "car parents," though -- sometimes kids even hop back in the car to be driven the space of four or five driveways... as though the game was to gather as much sugar and touch as few sidewalks as possible.
Yes, exactly -- the kids are often being driven from driveway to driveway. I suppose it's not a big deal when there are sidewalks and the street is not crowded, but even in those situations, the children who are out and about are going to be very distracted, as are the drivers. It's so reckless and I can only imagine how many children get hit due to this lack of care on the part of adults each year (not to mention all the near misses).
I am considering whether I should stop such drivers this year and speak to them.
Add it to the list of unthought consequences resulting in the name of "protection."
Well, if you do speak to them... you will have to write about what happened when you did :). Very possible that these parents also did not think the plan through or (like you said in your article) there are extenuating circumstances for the family. Still. Wrong day to be driving in erratic, unpredictable ways. Makes me wonder if I should put something reflective on my kids (who will very likely be in coats, since Halloween is traditionally the first day of really cold weather in Colorado)
I'm sure people do have their reasons...I'm sure they're not out to endanger others! It just strikes me as so ironic when a holiday tradition that is about adults doing nice things for children is inverted into adults endangering children. These drivers are literally endangering other children *while they think they are protecting their own children.*
I see this with cars generally. We live on a small street with a school on the end. Parents race down it at top speed, without any thought that there might be children in front yards or even walking home from school. Parents who are on their way to pick up their own precious children are neglecting the safety of the children who may be near or on the road! I *do* stop those parents and speak to them.
We do seem to be mixed up in our culture about what our responsibilities to community children are. There's a lot to be parsed here.
The school one is convicting... the priority is obviously the safety of all of the children, walking or carpooling, not whether or not my own kids get to school on time. There are many lessons to be learned from being a little late to school!
Yes. So much to be parsed, so much to be said about how our feelings of urgency wreak havoc on our ability to prioritize and think clearly!
The closest town to us goes all out for Halloween-- in a good way. Everyone is out and chatting for blocks and blocks. We live in the Northeast so the weather and carpet of crunchy leaves are just perfect too.
How wonderful! I love an old-fashioned Halloween. I hate to see it turned into something sexy or a celebration of gore; some fun spookiness and lots of neighborliness and crunchy fall leaves (if you can get 'em) is the way to go!
Never imagined that would be going on. Talk about helicopter parenting at its most ridiculous. How did we Boomers survive going out alone, walking block after block deep into the night (9 p.m. maybe).
Finally catching up on postings from the last week and couldn’t wait to read this one! We live in a very similar neighborhood, in a very rural area, so it becomes flooded with kids.. and cars! It seems like a lot often park and come out to walk, but there are still too many driving around for my comfort. The streets are very crowded with families, and there is no reason for a a parent to be lurking behind their kids in a car.
I hope many share this article this season (it’s needed!)
I think it's probably something particular to certain areas, and the rural town is definitely one of them! I would love to see this lurking, as you put it, decrease adn then cease!
In the Philippines, trick-or-treating is a recent practice. But we used to have what is called "Pangangaluluwa" or "Souling". Here, people dress like poor souls and go from house to house also and are given food. I think the original idea is to receive "soul cakes" representing food for souls and the receiving ones would say a prayer for the dead.
That's a wonderful tradition. I know an old song about soul cakes that we sing every year. We try to mark Halloween, All Saints, and All Souls in special ways in our family. We often take a lantern walk on All Souls day (and of course we visit a cemetery and pray for the dead). All Saints is my favorite -- we have a big dinner with some family friends and then we turn off all the lights, light lots and lots of candles, and sing the Litany of the Saints.
I hope these wonderful traditions can be passed on to future generations. Visiting the cemetery and lighting a candle while we pray as a family is something that marks this season for us each year.
"Spoiler alert: Not poison candy." This made me laugh out loud!
I've seen this and have genuinely never understood why this is a thing. Like you're saying, it's simply an unnecessary danger to everyone else. There has got to be a way for you, driver, to figure out how to let your kids trick-or-treat without your car being involved.
Halloween is one thing my small town still gets right. There is very long main street that is blocked by our police (including side access roads) to allow families to wander unrestricted for hours on Halloween night. No cars allowed past a certain zone. AND the police dress up, give out candy and get in on the fun. It's a really fun time for the kids and I'm thankful to live in a place where their fun and safety is prioritized.
SOME people take the costumes too far and seem to celebrate evil as you said but by and large it's a wholesome event.
That sounds like a great way to have a fun community Halloween! I think if people looked down on trailing kids in cars it would probably go away...wondering whether it's a good idea to stop drivers and ask them kindly not to drive into the crowd. I haven't decided yet. But it's a good thing to be talking about in any case.
You are right that Halloween appears to be the last remaining neighbourhood tradition, where we knock on each other's doors, actually get to interact with each other, and show goodwill especially towards young children. Although I am not a fan of the displayed gore and death, I appreciate the opportunity to meet many new faces, an opening to connections that carries over into the rest of the year. Fortunately our neighbourhood is very safe, and everyone is out on foot (no crazy drivers). The year of the pandemic, many older people made a particular effort to offer children joy, and had prepared outdoor tables heaped with candy bags, and even a candy shoot that could be operated from inside the house, working around some of the restrictions at that time. I had not grown up with this tradition in Switzerland, but appreciate the neighbourhood ties that it helps to form each year :)
I don't like the gore, either -- or many of the other things that Halloween now represents. Many adults these days seem to use it as an excuse to celebrate evil. The trick-or-treating part is something I hope we can hold onto, though, for the reasons you and I both appreciate! I'm so glad your neighborhood doesn't have crazy drivers, and does have a generous community spirit! That's as it should be.
I remember the candy chutes during the pandemic, too! So playful! My kids still talk about one particular house's epic chute.
I LOVE this - my husband & I were just talking about this very same thing...that Halloween is one of the last shared holidays everyone does together in our country. It's unspoken knowledge that a house with lights on will get door-knocked on Halloween. I love the bit of hospitality it invokes as we actually go door to door and greet neighbors who we may otherwise not know!
It's a special feeling, the neighborliness on that night, isn't it? And it only happens because we have this custom. Otherwise we'd be just as private and timid and wary as usual. We lost a lot when we lost so many of our communal customs...or just replaced them with ones geared towards disrespect and atomization.
I'm so glad you brought my awareness to this, I hadn't even thought about it! I have seen cars trailing their kiddos, and I agree that it is dangerous and ruins the whole "neighborhood" effect. We usually do a very short walking lap around the neighborhood, early in the evening, since everyone around here is so little. I have seen the "car parents," though -- sometimes kids even hop back in the car to be driven the space of four or five driveways... as though the game was to gather as much sugar and touch as few sidewalks as possible.
Yes, exactly -- the kids are often being driven from driveway to driveway. I suppose it's not a big deal when there are sidewalks and the street is not crowded, but even in those situations, the children who are out and about are going to be very distracted, as are the drivers. It's so reckless and I can only imagine how many children get hit due to this lack of care on the part of adults each year (not to mention all the near misses).
I am considering whether I should stop such drivers this year and speak to them.
Add it to the list of unthought consequences resulting in the name of "protection."
Well, if you do speak to them... you will have to write about what happened when you did :). Very possible that these parents also did not think the plan through or (like you said in your article) there are extenuating circumstances for the family. Still. Wrong day to be driving in erratic, unpredictable ways. Makes me wonder if I should put something reflective on my kids (who will very likely be in coats, since Halloween is traditionally the first day of really cold weather in Colorado)
I'm sure people do have their reasons...I'm sure they're not out to endanger others! It just strikes me as so ironic when a holiday tradition that is about adults doing nice things for children is inverted into adults endangering children. These drivers are literally endangering other children *while they think they are protecting their own children.*
I see this with cars generally. We live on a small street with a school on the end. Parents race down it at top speed, without any thought that there might be children in front yards or even walking home from school. Parents who are on their way to pick up their own precious children are neglecting the safety of the children who may be near or on the road! I *do* stop those parents and speak to them.
We do seem to be mixed up in our culture about what our responsibilities to community children are. There's a lot to be parsed here.
The school one is convicting... the priority is obviously the safety of all of the children, walking or carpooling, not whether or not my own kids get to school on time. There are many lessons to be learned from being a little late to school!
Yes. So much to be parsed, so much to be said about how our feelings of urgency wreak havoc on our ability to prioritize and think clearly!
The closest town to us goes all out for Halloween-- in a good way. Everyone is out and chatting for blocks and blocks. We live in the Northeast so the weather and carpet of crunchy leaves are just perfect too.
How wonderful! I love an old-fashioned Halloween. I hate to see it turned into something sexy or a celebration of gore; some fun spookiness and lots of neighborliness and crunchy fall leaves (if you can get 'em) is the way to go!
Let’s bring back Christmas caroling! We did it in Vancouver BC with our youth group & the neighbourhoods loved it!
Yes, that's such a wonderful tradition! We've done it a few times, too. So cheering for everyone!
Never imagined that would be going on. Talk about helicopter parenting at its most ridiculous. How did we Boomers survive going out alone, walking block after block deep into the night (9 p.m. maybe).
It's a real irony that parents trying to keep their kids safe are actually endangering other people's kids.
Finally catching up on postings from the last week and couldn’t wait to read this one! We live in a very similar neighborhood, in a very rural area, so it becomes flooded with kids.. and cars! It seems like a lot often park and come out to walk, but there are still too many driving around for my comfort. The streets are very crowded with families, and there is no reason for a a parent to be lurking behind their kids in a car.
I hope many share this article this season (it’s needed!)
I think it's probably something particular to certain areas, and the rural town is definitely one of them! I would love to see this lurking, as you put it, decrease adn then cease!
In the Philippines, trick-or-treating is a recent practice. But we used to have what is called "Pangangaluluwa" or "Souling". Here, people dress like poor souls and go from house to house also and are given food. I think the original idea is to receive "soul cakes" representing food for souls and the receiving ones would say a prayer for the dead.
That's a wonderful tradition. I know an old song about soul cakes that we sing every year. We try to mark Halloween, All Saints, and All Souls in special ways in our family. We often take a lantern walk on All Souls day (and of course we visit a cemetery and pray for the dead). All Saints is my favorite -- we have a big dinner with some family friends and then we turn off all the lights, light lots and lots of candles, and sing the Litany of the Saints.
I hope these wonderful traditions can be passed on to future generations. Visiting the cemetery and lighting a candle while we pray as a family is something that marks this season for us each year.
"Spoiler alert: Not poison candy." This made me laugh out loud!
I've seen this and have genuinely never understood why this is a thing. Like you're saying, it's simply an unnecessary danger to everyone else. There has got to be a way for you, driver, to figure out how to let your kids trick-or-treat without your car being involved.
Halloween is one thing my small town still gets right. There is very long main street that is blocked by our police (including side access roads) to allow families to wander unrestricted for hours on Halloween night. No cars allowed past a certain zone. AND the police dress up, give out candy and get in on the fun. It's a really fun time for the kids and I'm thankful to live in a place where their fun and safety is prioritized.
SOME people take the costumes too far and seem to celebrate evil as you said but by and large it's a wholesome event.
That sounds like a great way to have a fun community Halloween! I think if people looked down on trailing kids in cars it would probably go away...wondering whether it's a good idea to stop drivers and ask them kindly not to drive into the crowd. I haven't decided yet. But it's a good thing to be talking about in any case.